I recently had a new female client, age 26, also a small business owner join my service.  She was outgoing, very adorable, sent in all information asked for prior to the initial interview and seemed like a great new client.  I was wondering why she is single…mystery solved!

During this initial interview she mentioned several times that she was flaky and unreliable.  I heard her say that and replied that I didn’t find her to be that at all.  Did she mean in the past?  No, she replied, she still is.  Again, I stated that was not the impression I was getting at all.  She selected a few men she would like to meet and we were on our way.

The last thing I ask a new client to do after the initial interview is write a Narrative.  I spend a good 30 minutes going over what should be in it and shouldn’t, how long it should be and show them tons of examples of other clients’ Narratives explaining what is wrong or right about them.

I contacted her with no response.  Contacted her again and she said she was sick.  Waited a week and contacted her again both to see how she was feeling and get the Narrative.  Again no response.  I both called and wrote again with no response.  Finally I called again because while all of this was going on I had already contacted her first choice to meet and he was interested and had sent in his introduction fee of $35.  So he was waiting to hear something and have her both send in her fee and write her Narrative which I shared with her in the emails she didn’t respond to.  Again she said she was still sick.

I waited another week and tried contacting her as I had not received the Narrative or the introduction fee.  No response again.  So I blocked my phone number and called her, suspicious that if she knew who it was she wouldn’t answer.  I was right, she answered this time.  She told me that she had put the check in the mail that day and would work on the Narrative.  She also stated that she didn’t really want to meet anyone at the end of the year.  First time I heard that…she just joined the service and selected people.  So was she really sick?  Did she ever really put anything in the mail that day?  I highly doubt it…

The more I thought about it the more apprehensive I became to set my male client up with her (he was brand new too) as she was being flaky and unreliable.  I cannot in good faith set someone up with a person acting in this manner.  So I decided to curtail our relationship.  THEN, as I knew she would (I’ve been doing this for 25 years) she answered promptly saying she had put a check in the mail that morning for her introduction fee.  I suspected it wasn’t true.  I wrote back that I would void the check and send it back to her.  She definitely left me with the impression I would be receiving it.  That evening sending me an email saying she mailed CASH in a greeting card to me. Well, another week has gone by and surprise NOTHING!  So I wrote to her telling her I’ve received nothing and she writes back (again right away) that she pulled it from the mail when she got my email dropping her.  Well she told me exactly who she was from the beginning didn’t she?

The moral of this story is…when someone (even of the same sex) tells you exactly who they are the first time you meet them, BELIEVE THEM!  Especially if it is something negative.  I’ve seen that happen over and over.  Do yourself a favor and disengage from them right away, they know themselves and are warning you right from the get-go.  Suffice to say I will never set up a client with someone who I find out behaves in this way.  I leave that to other Denver matchmaking services and the Internet dating sites.  I really try to protect my current clients at all costs from having to deal with these types of personalities.

Published by Michele "the Matchmaker" Fields

I have been a professional Matchmaker for 34 years in Denver, CO. My service, Bon Jour Matchmaking Service, has facilitated 300+ marriages of 600+ Colorado Front Range singles through hand holding, personalized matchmaking. For more information go to

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