LOVE IS NOT A QUICK FIX

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service

I heard a story on the news yesterday about a way to fast track your love for someone.  I know we live in a society of quick fixes and immediate gratification but not all things should go that way.  This particular gimmick was pages of questions for 45 minutes and then staring at each other for FOUR minutes to create intimacy.

Is it really necessary to create intimacy on the first meeting or date?  The usual recommendation for a first meeting is not to get too serious about any subject.  It is a preliminary “date” to see if there is a reason to pursue.  That is more of a feeling than an inquisition!  Reading through this site you will see that Bon Jour Matchmaking’s philosophy is quite the opposite.

I also realize there are times when there is love at first sight that can be long lasting.  I’ve seen it…

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THIS DENVER MATCHMAKER IS MORE THE TORTOISE THAN THE HARE

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service

As you read through this website you will realize that Bon Jour Matchmaking Service has the philosophy of the tortoise by having an open-ended contract giving every client enough time for their best match to come in.  Not setting clients up just to set them up by ignoring their specifications and does not sell packages of dates for a finite period of time.

You can be like the hare and play it as a numbers game running through people who may not be honest on the Internet dating sites, buying packages of dates for a finite period, bragging about how many people you have met.  But that approach just wears you out, in my opinion.  It also erodes your positive attitude when you meet person after person who does not fit for you or who has misrepresented themselves.

Over the 33 years of professional matchmaking in Denver my clients have…

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WHO IS MICHELE THE MATCHMAKER FIELDS?

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service

Born and raised in Wilmington, Delaware I moved to Denver in 1981. I had never been here, did not know anyone here and did not have a job. Just showed up bright eyed and bushy tailed…like any 25 year old.

From 25 to 33 I had a variety of jobs but primarily was a legal secretary. Excited to be in this big city with so many options and people, I dated veraciously which in hindsight may have been my mistake. After 8 marriage proposals I never really met the “right” one for me…so I know that the “numbers game” is just that…a game not worth playing.

As a lifelong insomniac I realized that working specific hours was making it worse so decided to start my own business with my own hours. The only service then was GE and as a single myself looked at their structure and decided to do…

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MY FRIEND/MY BROTHER RICK BARBER (“Ricky”)

Reprinted in Westword…

I can’t think of a person who deserves this fate less than Rick Barber, former KOA Radio talk show host and my friend. Rick and I met in 2003 when his producer called me after reading my columns in The Denver Daily News on Dating and Relationships. He asked me to appear on the show which aired from 1 a.m. to 5 a.m. Although that was not really my target audience Rick’s reputation preceded him and I thought it would be good practice.

Rick and I had such a great chemistry on that first show that on the air he invited me to appear monthly, which lasted for three years. Meanwhile during that time Rick and I hung out discussing possible TV ideas, collaborating on topics for our shows and he attended several events with me that I was writing about on another weekly column in The Denver Daily News covering nonprofit fundraisers.

Our antics grew into a deep friendship talking everyday, getting together periodically and being there for each other. A few years ago I had foot surgery and Rick was one of three friends who was such a big help to me with doctor’s appointments, shopping and anything else I was unable to do at that time. Something I so appreciate and will never forget. I have been so fortunate to call Rick one of my closest friends. He knows the definition of friendship and walks the talk!Then a little over a year ago Clear Channel let Rick and many others go due to new management decisions. Rick always looked at the upside conscientiously applying for lots of other talk show positions at a variety of stations both in state and out of state. While doing that he enjoyed his favorite pastime of golf. Rick could golf 5 days a week and never tire of it! He cleverly applied for a position at a golf course so that he could play there for free and although the hours very crazy early, he thoroughly enjoyed the work and being outdoors on the course.

In around September he experienced what he thought was a pulled muscle that took him off the course for a few weeks. Rick is special in that he does not have a problem going to a doctor (like many men) if there is an issue. The muscle seemed to heal but in fairly short order he started experiencing weakness in that leg. One never jumps to the conclusion that it is something serious so he still chalked it up to a sore muscle pull.

Eventually as you may know by now it progressed leaving him weaker and weaker having to use a cane for assistance for stabilization when he walked. That went on for a few months but the strong leg started to weaken and he found in short order the need for a walker. Shockingly after only using the walker for about 3 weeks his strong leg weakened and he is now in a wheelchair.

But Rick is the bravest person I know…he faces all of this head on not shrinking away from any subject from end of life to okay what is next, okay now it’s a wheelchair, okay now it’s an assisted living facility I found for him, okay whatever comes next. He stays calm, smokes his cigarettes and the cigars I give him and just takes one thing at a time. He is seeing a doctor who fortuitously phoned me for my service and turned out to be an expert on neuroviral diseases at the University of Colorado and we are hoping she comes up with another diagnosis or prognosis than the first of ALS.

Everywhere I look in my house I think of Rick because of something he fixed, helped me with, enjoyed like my cat who loves him. Little did I know in December that would be the last time he would visit my home when we exchanged Christmas gifts. I’ve been holding a bottle of wine and a wine cooler for him for a year but now I guess I will have to take them over to EMERITUS at Highline where he is residing. The staff is wonderful and the Executive Director, Tom Hunter, was kind enough to work with me negotiating with his superior to waive the entrance fee for Rick and get him a more affordable monthly fee for a private room.

The staff is very attentive to Rick’s needs and he is safe and well taken care of there.

This is a description of my friend Rick Barber celebrating the person he is and how very brave he has been while going through this devastating illness.

I think of Ricky every day of my life and miss him…

BEST BOSTON SINGLES

Received a call from Jennifer at the above. She did what they all do…we have a client who moved to Denver and would like to have you transfer her to your service.

They know nothing about me, my clients or my service. So this is what you singles back East are paying for…to be “tranferred” to companies that know nothing about you or you them. I did some research on them and they have horrible reviews, including on the BBB and Yelp. One person mentioned that she paid $10,000!

Beware of this kind of service! I have written about this many, many times on here. This is not what you are paying for. If someone moves to Denver, they should hire a Denver matchmaker. I need a full profile and pictures just like any of my other clients. Although I haven’t spoken directly to Jennifer, by her lengthy message like with the other out -of-state services who have contacted me, you’ve paid them lots of money and they “may” offer me a couple hundred to take you. That’s usually how it works.

I don’t work that way and if they had bothered to actually read this site, they would know that!

WHAT AM I PAYING FOR AT BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE?

CALL ME…This is NOT a “sales” call, merely an exchange of information.

When you decide to become a client of Bon Jour Matchmaking you pay a one-time investment fee.  What you are basically investing in is the invaluable time to work with me for as long as it may take to find the right person for you through the open-ended contract and coaching along the way.

There are no monthly or annual fees.  No re-sign up fees due to my open-ended contract.  Your Investment Fee pays for the following:

  • It covers all the time spent before you become a client on advice and information in your phone consultation which could be more than one call before you decide to come in;
  • A Matchmaker who knows all of her clients personally and has interviewed each and every one;
  • 33 years of matchmaking experience!
  • An extensive background check (cost is mine) which includes a Google search as well as social media searches;
  • The 2-hour interview in my private office;
  • Viewing confidential client profiles at the time of the interview and getting to know each other;
  • Calling your selection(s) to read them your entire profile clarifying and correcting misinterpretations and then e-mailing them your photos;
  • Should that person decline, going through the same process with your next choice;
  • When your selection says YES, collecting the $35 per introduction fee from both sides;
  • Giving out both contact information and instructions as to how to proceed and rereading profiles before the  meeting;
  • Receiving phone calls from both clients after their meeting with feedback;
  • Coaching either or both clients as to how to make a better impression, not jump to conclusions, etc.;
  • Also letting a client know someone is or is not interested if they were not clear at your meeting and WHY;
  • Once you are on file, presenting YOUR profile to all new clients who fit your preferences and criteria;
  • There are many times I may present your profile that it is not selected and I do not earn a fee;
  • There may be many times you decline to meet someone who has selected you and I do not earn a fee;
  • Going through the above process of sharing, calling, collecting and coaching;
  • The one-time filing fee covers however long or short you may be in the service;
  • Updating pictures and information as we move along.

What does the per Introduction Fee pay for?

  • This fee is ONLY paid when both clients agree they would like to meet;
  • It is paid by both clients because they are both receiving the introduction;
  • It shows that both clients feel this is a viable match and might have potential;
  • This minimal fee invested by both clients shows they both have “some skin in the game”;
  • Collecting your fee, sharing contact information, receiving feedback and
  • Coaching based on the feedback and letting you know the interest level of the person you met;
  • If either client declines a match, there is no introduction fee from either side;
  • The client controls how much they spend on introduction fees based on how many people they feel are appropriate matches and who agrees to meet them.

MY ROLE AS A DENVER MATCHMAKER

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service

Over the 33 years I’ve been matchmaking, one of my best attributes now is the ability to listen carefully. To follow my clients’ preferences and criteria and most importantly not to make decisions FOR them but rather WITH them.

Those qualities only come with years of experience in the business of professional matchmaking. Over all of these years I’ve seen clients choose people who surprised me and rejected people I thought they would like. So I’ve learned not to make matching decisions for them and to present people who I’m not sure they would be interested in. I don’t know everything and sometimes the clients don’t know themselves who may interest them ultimately.

I warn my clients be careful what you tell me in your criteria and preferences because I follow them closely. I will check to see if you have any flexibility and often most of my clients do…

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HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL I MEET IN THIS DENVER MATCHMAKING SERVICE?

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service

When you call for your FREE phone consultation you may ask how many people you will meet.  First of all that is primarily up to you.  When I show you profiles at the time of your interview if you do not select anyone that is your prerogative.  If once you are on file as a client you turn down every one who wants to meet you then, again, that is up to you.

I have no way of knowing how many people you will meet and my goal is not to set you up with everyone in town.  This is matchmaking.  The phone consultation does not go into the detailed depth that the interview does so by the time I know your background and all of your criteria and preferences at the interview the number of prospective matches obviously will go down.  This is matchmaking, the information has to…

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EVERYTHING YOU WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS DENVER MATCHMAKING SERVICE

 NOTE:  If your mentality is that it’s a numbers game and you wish to meet someone every week…this is NOT the service for you.  This is a MATCHMAKING service NOT a dating service.  It is VERY specific in introducing you ONLY to people who fit your criteria and preferences, and of course, you fit theirs.  THAT is why it is so successful!

To understand my overall structure please read the HOME PAGE for an overview.  Just click on the link to go to that Page or Post.  Also you may wish to read WHAT AM I PAYING FOR AT BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE If you are married or separated please do not call me as my clients are only interested in people who are currently available for a long term relationship and/or marriage.

Be sure to read the lists of What Effects Your Investment Fee in Bon Jour.  Any one or more of those listed may bring DOWN your fee!

One of the biggest differences about Bon Jour Matchmaking from any other service is the Win/Win Policy.  Click on the link to go to that information.

It might interest you why I turn down so many potential clients.  I think this makes a lot of sense on both sides of the equation.  In addition you may want to read WHY YOU MAY NOT BE THE RIGHT CLIENT FOR THIS DENVER MATCHMAKER.

Another Page you may want to read is WHAT TO EXPECT FROM THE INTERVIEW so there won’t be any surprises and you can view my home office. Yes, I have a private office in which I keep all my client profiles and where you can be candid and open when we meet, unlike services who interview you in public forums.  Check out  YOUR PICTURES FOR BON JOUR

The next Page you should view is POSTS TO READ BEFORE JOINING ANY DENVER MATCHMAKING SERVICE. That Page has an abundance of Posts for you to access with both general information about dating/matchmaking services as well as advice in a variety of areas, i.e., selecting services, matchmaking service fees, what turns men off, how to be a collaborative Bon Jour Matchmaking client, etc. Of course you do not have to read every Post listed on that Page, just the ones that interest you the most.

Another Post of interest may be What types of singles are the most successful when working with a Denver Matchmaker.  This information is based on knowing personally each and every client, their priorities, their preferences and their criteria.

Exciting New Policy

CLIENTS’ TESTIMONIALS is a Page you should read as those reviews of Bon Jour Matchmaking go all the way back to 1989.  I could not include all Testimonials I’ve received over the 33 years, however those should give you an idea of how clients feel about the structure and working with me.

For personal background information on me you should view the Page entitled ABOUT THIS PROFESSIONAL DENVER MATCHMAKING EXPERT. This will give you info on my volunteer work in the community, how old I was when I started the service, etc.

There are approximately 186+ Posts on Michele’s Blog all of which give you an insight into the clientele, my work ethic, the structure of the service and more.  Also, the Pages on the right hand navigation will take you to important information. Once you feel you understand the service, for the most part and have questions, please phone me to chat. Especially phone me if you do not understand my philosophy or have questions about things you have read or perhaps missed reading. For my hours you may go to HOURS, LOCATIONS, FEES for specifics.

I hope this Post/Page helps you navigate the site more easily.  Call me to schedule your FREE phone consultation at 303-756-8106 or write to michelethematchmaker@gmail.com

WHY IS BON JOUR UNIQUE?

I began my matchmaking career in 1989 after many years of dabbling in other vocations. I never could have imagined that 33 years later I would still be a professional matchmaker even though my goal was to make this a lifetime career. I attribute this success to the structure of the service. Bon Jour Matchmaking Service was created when I was 33 years old and my clientele ranged from 25-40. At this time, I represent clients ranging in age from 27-65! They are made up of Denver’s elite, well read and educated professionals who are financially stable, active singles who desire a lasting marriage or relationship.

As a professional personalized matchmaker, it has been most important for me to study and evaluate the landscape of the local matchmaking scene. Knowing how other services operate has assisted me in structuring Bon Jour Matchmaking Service to be extremely client friendly, with reasonable fees and personal attention. Thus, my one-time fee is extremely affordable comparatively.

Some of the many unique features that make Bon Jour stand out from the crowded marketplace are the open-ended contract which each client receives. I don’t nickel and dime clients to death, the background checks are free, there is no annual fee. Each client receives a 6-page profile and a minimum of 6 pictures which are shared with clients. I have met and interviewed each and every client, unlike services with multiple “matchmakers” who only know the people they’ve sold. To continue to keep my fees more affordable than other services, I use a free website loaded with pertinent information rather than glossy, gimmicky expensive websites that your fee goes to. You will NEVER see a review saying that I don’t return calls or am hard to reach. I am prompt, more so than my clients sometimes, at responding to calls and emails!

In Bon Jour the client and I decide collaboratively who they select to meet. And the client always has the last word based on the information I’ve referenced above. This is definitely at MATCHMAKING service and not a dating service. You are not buying a package of dates, deciding between multiple plans with multiple fees. Any client may meet however many people they select, who also agree to meet them. This is NOT a service where one or the other sex is free and just a data base. Everyone in Bon Jour has paid the investment fee and made both a financial and emotional commitment!

If you have further questions, please send me a note at michelethematchmaker@gmail.com and I will personally respond or phone me at 303-756-8106.

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