Born and raised in Wilmington, Delaware I moved to Denver in 1981. I had never been here, did not know anyone here and did not have a job. Just showed up bright eyed and bushy tailed…like any 25 year old.
From 25 to 33 I had a variety of jobs but primarily was a legal secretary. Excited to be in this big city with so many options and people, I dated veraciously which in hindsight may have been my mistake. After 8 marriage proposals I never really met the “right” one for me…so I know that the “numbers game” is just that…a game not worth playing.
As a lifelong insomniac I realized that working specific hours was making it worse so decided to start my own business with my own hours. The only service then was GE and as a single myself looked at their structure and decided to do the total opposite thus creating my niche which has flourished for 31 years!
During all this dating and working I volunteered as a rape crisis counselor for RAAP, a counselor for Safehouse for Battered Women and a bereavement counselor for a hospice. I also was involved in fundraising through golf tournaments such as the NFL Alumni Association and the Restaurant Association.
I have a PhD. in dating and relationships from 40 years of doing so unlike someone who has been married for years and doesn’t know the landscape or the current dating apps and internet dating sites. I can totally relate to the frustrations, disappointments, excitement, anticipation and all that goes with trying to find your life partner. Thus allowing me to counsel, console and hand hold my clients during this process. Also to make sure that each match has the best chance by clarifying, correcting and sharing communication between clients so this delicate match has every chance of succeeding.
As far as I know Bon Jour Matchmaking is, and has been, the only Denver matchmaking service that has offered for 30+ years an open-ended contract FREE OF CHARGE to EVERY client.
What is the value of an open-ended contract? There is no way to know when the “right” person for you will come in so to have a limited contract that a company continues to try to resign you to make fees is worthless. Let’s say you have a 6 month contract with another service and the “perfect” person for you comes in in month 7…too bad for you!
In addition I do not waste your time setting you up with people who do not fit the criteria you’ve set forth. I adhere very closely to that (so be careful what you stipulate) unlike the other Denver matchmakers (read their reviews, they are consistent how they’ve been set up with people who don’t remotely fit what they’ve stipulated).
You already know that to find the right person has taken time or you wouldn’t be reading this. It may or may not take time in here as well. My goal is to find that person on the first or second match…but that may take time…or not. Just be realistic…I’m a Matchmaker NOT a magician.
The longest I’ve worked with a client was 11 years…and I did get her married in that 11th year. The man she married only met his first choice, her, right after he came in and married her a year later! There was some coaching involved to help this relationship progress. I’ll hang in there as long as you will…
There are MANY different and exceptional aspects to Bon Jour but the open-ended contract is at the top of the list.
There are so many valuable aspects to Bon Jour Matchmaking before and during your courtship with that special person.
They are listed throughout this site and if you’ve used other local services or even researched them these differences are glaringly obvious.
When considering any service it is a 50/50 proposition. As a client you should be realistic in that your participation, keeping info up-to-date, your feedback, your interaction with clients and YOUR choice in Bon Jour as to who you meet (and don’t meet) is heavily on your side of the equation. It’s NOT just about writing a check and then being a non-participant. Also, the ONE-time investment fee regardless of how long you are in the service!
In Bon Jour you first and foremost have an open-ended contract. So far the longest I’ve worked with someone is 11 years and she did end up marrying a client at the end of that time. If it had taken longer for the right person to appear then we would have gone longer.
The abundance of information you receive on each prospect and the fact that YOU decide your interest level in meeting someone. The immense amount of coaching, the feedback directly from the source, the fact that I respond IMMEDIATELY or ASAP to calls and emails from clients and always have.
Just like with friends, colleagues, dating and even family our relationship may go through some growth spirts and ups and downs. Practicing professional hands-on, old fashioned matchmaking for 30+ years I’ve run into all kinds of individuals. Obviously most of those relationships and interactions have gone well or I wouldn’t still be here. But there certainly have been people that were unhappy, difficult, unrealistic or we just eventually didn’t click. You get the straight scoop in here which is what my clients want, tempered with tact (hopefully). So when reading reviews keep all of this in mind and consider all that you get from this service that you do not get anywhere else.
Having been in business with Bon Jour Matchmaking Service for 30 years I realize and so should you that I have and will run across people who don’t get it, have their own agenda playing and are just not reasonable, mature or nice people. Unfortunately in this line of career I run across more of those than normal.
People who misunderstand, misinterpret and are just out to bash others trying to do the right thing. The Internet gives them ample opportunity to voice their own biased experience and opinion all over the place. That is certainly the case with Stephanie Lindquist. Imagine someone expecting a business owner to be available every minute of the hours they offer when there is a myriad of responsibilities that owner takes care of. That is exactly WHY I have the vast amount of hours that I have!
I never even spoke with Stephanie Lindquist and she has nothing better to do than write nasty reviews when she didn’t have time to call for the FREE telephone consultation but clearly has the time to write nasty reviews and place them all over the Internet! Again, I made the right call in very short order after an email interaction with her that I did not want to even talk with her or represent her. So she is totally lying when she says SHE decided not to use the service. I don’t want to embarrass her by sharing HER email response when I merely said I couldn’t conduct the phone consultation when she asked for it. It clearly says on here there is no need to schedule that consultation, just call. So she isn’t great at following directions either which would make her a less than desirable client.
I really felt the need to clarify and remind you the consumer that the best way to judge a business is to go by the majority of reviews that say the same thing. That’s what I do when judging whether to use a business.
The actual reason for this post is that there seems to be some confusion from time to time and I want to clarify. Some clients and future clients have thought they can only meet or date one person at a time. NOT TRUE. That is TOTALLY up to each individual client. If you are comfortable meeting and/or dating more than one person that is absolutely YOUR prerogative.
Additionally I want to clarify also because of confusion based on experience in other Denver matchmaking services…this is nothing like other services and that is why you are still searching for assistance. There is no such thing as “HOLD” in Bon Jour. Regardless of what your situation is at a point in time I still share your profile with new clients if and when appropriate. If they select to meet you I would then email you asking your current status. People’s status is very fluid so checking periodically is more than appropriate. Also, I can’t possibly remember over months or years that you are involved with someone which new clients did and didn’t view your profile when they came in so I just continue to show it and check with you.
Just more info showing yet more differences between Bon Jour Matchmaking and other Denver matchmakers and Denver dating services.
CALL ME…This is NOT a “sales” call, merely an exchange of information.
As I’ve written many times on this website, I turn down more potential clients (and income) than I accept. If I sense that this really is not what you are looking for in a service or potential relationship (doesn’t line up with my clientele) I would rather decline to work together than sign you and disappoint you.
That’s why the initial FREE PHONE CONSULTATION is sooooo important and that you be honest and candid, not only about what type of relationship you desire but also about your personal information. I recently had two people lie to me about their age and I don’t work with people who lie. If you want to lie use Internet Dating Sites! How do I know they lied? I do a background check before you become a client both for my safety and for my clients as well as to make sure the information you have presented is true and honest.
If you do not fit what my clientele is looking for as stipulated in their 6 page profiles I cannot accept you and take your money if there is minimal or no chance of success. Also, if my clientele does not fit what you are looking for I will decline. Because I interview EVERY client I know their criteria and use the general specifications from all clients to determine whether someone new is what they are looking for.
If you are combative with me and argumentative, obviously we would not make good partners. That is a bad way to start and I would decline. Yes, that actually happens from time to time. We have to be a good match first to accomplish your goals.
Very often when people contact me at Bon Jour Matchmaking one of the questions they ask is what is my success rate.
My success rate has everything to do with you as a client. If you turn down everyone who would like to meet you, don’t select people to meet who are the best prospects (which I tell you), continue to make the same mistakes I have pointed out to you through my coaching, well your success rate will not be as good as a client who is more open minded with prospective matches or listens to my coaching and implements it.
We are a collaborative partnership. It’s not just MY success rate in this Denver matchmaking service. You as a client have everything to do with your success. I have several clients who have superficial requirements that must be met or they are not interested. I.e., one woman will not consider men who are conservative regardless of how good a fit they are in other ways. Doesn’t even want to see their profiles.
Another is an avid skier and directly told me not to show anyone her profile who is not an avid skier as all of her vacations are ski vacations. A male client is only interested in women who emulate Cameron Diaz. If she is “exotic” like Angelina Jolie he’s not interested. Well….I follow strictly what I’m told, unlike the other local Denver matchmaking or Denver dating services. That’s the good news, but if you are so restrictive as these clients it may take forever to make that match.
So, in short, my success is based on the client completely.
WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE?
Let me count the ways that I am different from all those “matchmaking services” who sell packages of dates! First of all that says it right there…they sell packages of DATES so they are DENVER DATING SERVICES NOT MATCHMAKERS.
Why, why, why would anyone pay thousands of dollars to let someone you’ve met briefly decide FOR YOU who you are going to meet when you’ve only bought so many DATES? They give you no information, no pictures and they make the decisions. Consistently their reviews state over and over that clients were not set up with people who fit their criteria. Even when they’ve specified repeatedly what they are looking for. You know why? All the service has to do is throw how ever many people you’ve bought at you and they’ve met the contract. Really, does that sound like a matchmaking service???
Here’s what a REAL DENVER MATCHMAKING SERVICE should provide:
- Extensive profiles on each and every client;
- Current pictures of each and every client;
- A reasonable length contract allowing clients to meet their goals;
- A collaboration between client and Matchmaker;
- Client decides based on the aforementioned information who they would like to meet;
- Not wasting clients’ time on matches that don’t fit their criteria and preferences;
- Feedback following each introduction and following clients for up to 2 months while dating;
- Coaching before, during and after introductions.
THAT IS WHAT BON JOUR MATCHMAKING PROVIDES TO EACH AND EVERY CLIENT.
I’ve written many Posts about what makes a good client but after my interaction this morning with a current client who is the perfect example of a poor client I’ve decided to explain.
Before you meet anyone in Bon Jour you have to have a good relationship with me. I am your agent, coach, matchmaker and advocate. If our relationship is not good than more than likely you may not achieve the success you desire. We have to communicate clearly and as a client you MUST keep all information and pictures updated.
This morning it was like pulling teeth….first she writes that she is now available to meet people and there are no updates. Then she writes she moved but no address. Then she sends the address but with no zip code or specifics after prompting and I try to call her. Her cell is no longer a working number…REALLY????? So I write again asking for the correct number. She sends that and then says she got a puppy. Those are changes… then writes that she lost 8 lbs. but does not give me her current weight. So I ask again, she still has not given me that. These are obvious updates and should have been shared when they happened! Come on…
Then I say I need current pictures reflecting her weight loss and she sends me old pictures from before the weight loss. As of 4/11/19 she still has not sent me current pictures. THIS IS NOT AN INTERNET DATING SITE OR A DATING APP. Everything must be current and is in your best interest to be current!
Regarding pictures…one of the biggest benefits of Bon Jour Matchmaking is that I share pictures of all of my clients. They have to be current and preferably taken specifically for this endeavor. I don’t think that’s too much to ask when you are making both a financial and emotional investment with me.