Michele “the Matchmaker” Fields has been matching for so long that she has found a recurring theme that turns men off.

Bon Jour Matchmaking has a clientele of very educated, involved and evolved, professional female clients. These lovely women have filled up their lives with activities, family, travel, work and volunteering in the community.

When my male clients view a profile with sooooo much filling a woman’s life he always states, “when will she have time for a relationship?”. I totally get that you shouldn’t stop living and just wait for a man, BUT, whether you use the Internet or a local dating or matchmaking service you have to carve out time to date and to appear available.

I recently had 3 men comment negatively about a woman I set them up with (same woman).  She left them with the impression that she just “fit in” the initial meeting with them in-between her other activities. It was quite apparent to them and all were turned off and passed on a second date. I gave her that feedback and she is going to adjust her life accordingly.

As your Matchmaker it is my job to point out behavior or appearance that turns the opposite sex off.  I have that information based on all of the feedback from your matches.  Then it is up to you to make those adjustments so that you will have more success in future matches.

In the 24 year history of Bon Jour Matchmaking Service this scenario has happened over and over. I’m not saying sit at home and wait for a man…I am saying that when a good man presents himself be sure he views you as available.

Published by Michele "the Matchmaker" Fields

I have been a professional Matchmaker for 34 years in Denver, CO. My service, Bon Jour Matchmaking Service, has facilitated 300+ marriages of 600+ Colorado Front Range singles through hand holding, personalized matchmaking. For more information go to

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