It’s Time to Get Real When Using Dating/Matchmaking Venues
Regardless of whether you choose the Internet dating services, local activity groups, dinner groups or matchmakers as a client you need to get real! If you expect to meet the perfect person right out of the gate you need to think again. No service can guarantee when you call them initially or when you join that “the” perfect person is there waiting for you. Having unrealistic expectations will only frustrate and disappoint you. Timing and fate play a huge role in this process and that may have already been decided for a year after you join. It is important to join a service that has an open-ended contract so when that “perfect match” presents themselves you are in the service!
The most appropriate questions to ask when contacting local services are: How long have you been in business? (Then check that out on the BBB website); I am ____ age and want to date people within _____ age range, do you have any clients in that range? How long is the contract? What is your fee? Is there ONE matchmaker who knows ALL of your clients? You’d be surprised how important THAT is! They should be able to answer those over the phone.
To ask how many people you will meet leaves a reputable service without an honest answer. There really is no way to know from a short phone call how many people you will meet (unless you buy a certain number of dates, which I’ve advised against over and over). There are so many factors to consider to answer that question such as age range, location, children, education, politics, interests, allergies, appearance, personality, etc., to give an HONEST answer by phone without the information is just not possible. You could be shown 50 files and turn them all down or you could be shown 3 and those 3 could be great matches! Remember, you are only going to marry ONE person!
Yes, sometimes fate takes over and you get lucky. The first person you meet is the right one for you. I have had many clients who have had that experience. But it didn’t always happen on both sides. Often the person they marry may have been in the service for some period of time before their perfect match appeared. The key is PATIENCE. Do you want to waste time and emotion dating a bunch of the wrong people just so you can say you are dating? Or is it more satisfying and beneficial to be patient until the most appropriate matches come along? After all, you’ve waited this long, the right one is worth the wait however short or long that may be…
You can buy a certain number of dates from many local services and they will throw you together with Tom, Dick and Mary to meet the contract. Or you can be more discriminating and allow a real, professional Matchmaker to work with you personally to achieve your goal(s) without contract expiration being a concern.
MORE IS NOT ALWAYS BETTER! Ask the more than 300 couples who married either the first or second person they met through Bon Jour Matchmaking Service. They know it’s not a numbers game.