ANOTHER MARRIAGE FROM BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE!

CONGRATULATIONS to Leslie and Tom on their recent marriage.  In the case of this couple each one selected several potential prospects, however they had each other high on their lists.  Consequently after their first choices didn’t click they were each other’s second choice.

After a year of dating they became engaged and now they are Bon Jour Matchmaking’s 313th couple!  Yes, this can work if you agree with my philosophy and are motivated to meet the right person regardless of how long that may take.

With my open-ended contracts for all clients, you have all the time in the world to find the person you’ve always hoped to spend your life with.  Bon Jour Matchmaking is filled with highly educated, physically fit, volunteer oriented, adventurous Denver and Front Range singles.  If that describes you, please review this site, read lots of Posts and give me a call if it resonates with you and you are a 27-65 year old professional at 303-756-8106

Again, I and all my clients congratulate Leslie and Tom!

WHAT IS INSANITY WHEN IT COMES TO USING A DENVER MATCHMAKER?

To quote the brilliant Albert Einstein, “The definition of INSANITY is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”  This was requoted to me by a new client prior to his interview as the reason he decided to stop using Internet dating sites and work with a professional Denver Matchmaker.

So that along with his age range which I found to be very appropriate and open-mindedness led me to believe that this would be a client who would be flexible and approach selecting matches differently than when he used the Internet dating sites.  Oh contrar…after viewing about 15 profiles and selecting one and one maybe I could see that the above quote, although recited by him, was not really how he felt and operated.

This is his logic in his selection process:

He has grown children and prefers someone who has had children BECAUSE that is a comfortable and natural place to start conversing.  So he shied away from women without children.  This would be an opportunity for him to stretch beyond his own comfort zone and learn how to converse and connect with anyone whether they’ve had children or not.

He’s 5’10” and did not want to meet anyone shorter than 5’4″ or taller than 5’8″.  No women with younger children under 13.  Because of allergies no women with multiple pets, ONLY really gorgeous women, etc., etc. and the list goes on.  It became clear that he was selecting exactly as he had on the Internet and Apps which he found unsuccessful.

So going back to the above definition of INSANITY, in his mind the fact that he is working with a Matchmaker is the element of difference from what he had been doing.  But in reality if he approaches working with me in the exact same way he did on the Internet and apps he’s apt to get the same results.  His perfect match might be someone 5’2″ and pretty or 5’5″ but with younger children or 5’3″ with no children…you get the idea.  Everyone has an idea of the “perfect” person for them based on past experience and preferences.  But if you are still alone you need to take a look at those and see which ones you would be willing to negotiate for other great traits.  Otherwise, you may stay as you are.

If you decide to do something different, do it differently and THEN maybe you will be successful.

DENVER MATCHMAKER ALWAYS WORKING

Yes, not only is Bon Jour Matchmaking Service in Denver, CO open 7 days a week, but I am also on the job all holidays!

Love doesn’t take a holiday and neither do I.  Also, I want to get as many Denver singles in before the new year as possible before my fees increase for my 25th Anniversary January, 2014.

So check out my hours on the Hours, Locations, etc. page and call me for your preliminary informational phone consultation and let’s see if we’re a good match…303-756-8106

DENVER MATCHMAKING BUSINESS IS BOOMING ON THIS 25th ANNIVERSARY

For some unknown but wonderful reason business is booming going into the 25th anniversary for Bon Jour Matchmaking Service!  Also, there are many situations that have come up this year that have never come up before.  The Universe is speaking and appreciating this well established Denver Matchmaker (click on the blue print to go to post).

The quality of the singles who are selecting to call me for their FREE initial phone consultation are of the highest quality and many fit into the established clientele.  Of  course there are folks who are focused on how many people they will meet, meeting for FREE to have me size them up and tell them if they are marketable, people who are totally unrealistic and more.  For those people I suggest other types of services that better fit their agenda.

Regardless of the people I decline to work with, obviously then the ones I decide to collaborate with and vice versa, who really get my philosophy and how the service can work for them, are the cream of the crop.  That doesn’t always mean they all are the richest or most attractive, but we all know there’s more to a person than money and looks, right???  But their education, backgrounds, lifestyle and community service add to their quality.

I feel very blessed this year in particular to have so many singles and new Denver residents contact me over the other local services.  They report that based on reading through this Website and comparing my length of time in business, the success rate, the philosophy, the advice and last but not least, the Bon Jour Testimonials (click on the blue print to go to post) they confide that they choose Bon Jour over other Denver matchmaking services as the real thing…

DENVER MATCHMAKER EXPLAINS HER WORK ETHIC

Although I’ve alluded to it in several posts I thought I would just directly explain what Bon Jour Matchmaking both provides to all clients and what is expected in return.  It’s not that I’m a control freak, it’s that I know all of my clients personally and individually so I know how they think.  Isn’t that what you want from a personal Matchmaker?

This is a total collaboration meaning from the very first time you call me I start noticing your grammar, whether your outgoing voice mail contains some part of your name (making it easier for a match to know they’ve called the right number) instead of something automated that could be anyone.

Whether you’ve paid attention to what I’ve explained multiple times in this website that if you wish to be quoted a fee you need to CALL me as there are several questions I need to ask that combine for your personal investment fee.  Because there is dating coaching with Bon Jour Matchmaking it is important for me to gauge whether you are receptive to suggestions and follow directions.

There is a specific time span in which clients need to contact me and each other when matched as well as a specific time frame in which you need to meet.  The reason for this is that you can only stay excited about meeting someone new for a limited period before you either get turned off by not hearing from them or jump to the conclusion they are not interested and/or unreliable.  A person’s enthusiasm for the meeting is most important and that can only be maintained for a fairly short time span.

I want you to be successful in this matchmaking endeavor.  Along that line, knowing what turns all of my clients on and off, I really try to work with you very personally tweaking what you write about that will interest them so that you will stand out and the types of photos that are the most favorable.  Your success in this Denver matchmaking service is not based on me, but primarily on you and how open you are, who you choose to meet, utilizing suggestions and being overall dependable, unlike clients in other services and the Internet dating sites.

I decline more singles than I accept based on the above and what I glean from our initial interactions.  Thus making Bon Jour a service with reliable clients who are serious about their romantic futures and a Matchmaker who is on call 7 days a week and holidays, returns calls and emails very quickly and never shies away from even a stressful interaction with clients.  A true collaboration with both client and Matchmaker holding up their responsibility to reach their goal.

REMEMBERING DANTE ZARLENGO

In the time that I’ve lived in Colorado I’ve had two best friends who I could always count on.  One was Rick Barber who is mentioned throughout this Blog.  The other was Dante Zarlengo.

Dante was an oil and gas attorney in the Denver law firm where Governor Dick Lamm practiced in the eighties.   I had the good fortune to work as a legal secretary for that firm and was assigned to Dante because he was so tough…bad handwriting and demanding.  My mother had horrible handwriting so I was able to decipher his.  We hit it off, as I always had with my bosses, and built a long and very dear friendship.  It was while working for Dante that I decided to start Bon Jour Matchmaking Service and make matchmaking my career.  (Click on the link to go to Post)

Dante helped me with all of the legalities needed to set up a business at no charge.  He was my friend, my supporter.  He was a giver…a great father of 3 very successful sons, a supportive and devoted husband, a wonderful lawyer and loyal friend.  Today is 21 years since his passing.  I can’t believe it…I met Rick Barber from KOA radio shortly before Dante passed away and was supposed to attend the ClearChannel Christmas party with Rick that evening of December 5, 2003.  I was not able to attend once I heard about Dante’s impending death.

But also today is the day Nelson Mandela left this earth so Dante is in good company.  Of all the days of the year and the many months President Mandela was ill, he passed on the same day as my dear friend Dante Zarlengo.  Dante died from lung cancer (he never smoked) eight months after being diagnosed.  The American doctors proclaimed there was nothing they could do and gave him a prognosis of 2 to 5 years.  So Dante tried an experimental treatment in Zurich.  In my opinion that treatment hastened his death.  But he fought until the very end tooth and nail.  It was just his time.  I sincerely hope that he found more happiness in his next life than he found in this one.

The Zarlengo family is well known in Denver with many professionals such as dentists, judges, attorneys, etc.  It is a large Italian family with roots in Colorado.

I still miss Dante every day and feel blessed to have not only worked for and known this kind man, but also to call him my friend.

WHO ARE BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE’S CLIENTS?

If you are wondering what types of qualities, vocations, personality traits and heart describe the Denver singles who choose to become clients of Bon Jour Matchmaking, my clients are fortunate enough to have stable finances and are givers.  They believe strongly in giving back to the world due to their own good fortune.  Following is a summary:

VOCATIONS:

Engineers; Petroleum Engineers; Owners of International Companies; Psychologists; Psychotherapists; Doctors; Architects; Pharmacists; Attorneys; Physicians; Veterinarians; Real Estate Professionals; Physical Therapist; Organizational Psychologist; College Internal Auditor; Business Owners; Sales Managers for Tech Companies; Environmental Health and Safety Expert; Financial Advisors; Optometrist; Graphic Artist; government finance, a variety of doctors of various specialties.

VOLUNTEER ACTIVITIES:

Animal shelter volunteers; Eco-tourism in Guatemala; Red Cross crisis volunteer; hospice volunteer; Peace Corps; Doctors Without Boarders; post Katrina assistance; United Nations Refugee Camp in Hong Kong for Vietnamese “Boat People”; Red Cross Disaster Action Team; Emergency Medical Technician; BOD of Easter Seals Colorado; BOD of Mullen High School Foundation; Big Brothers/Big Sisters; Project C.U.R.E.; Habitat for Humanity; Heifer International

TRAVEL:

Africa, UK, Russia, Hong Kong, Singapore, Philippines, Australia, Papua New Guinea, Costa Rica, Italy, Thailand, Uganda, British Columbia, Germany, England, France, Scotland, Wales, Jordan, New Zealand, Afghanistan, British Virgin Islands, Galapagos Islands, Venezuela, Nepal, Bhutan, Peru, Kilimanjaro, Aleutian Islands, extensive domestic travel

HOBBIES:

Exotic car restoration and racing; home restoration; collections of artwork, cars; spectator sports; martial arts; whitewater rafting; NAIA Academic All American; Navy Reserves; bungy jumping; para-sailing; Yoga; skiing; biking; fly fishing; hiking; skydiving; pilots; marathons; fast cars; concerts; charity walk/runs; horseback riding; kayaking; traveling

INSTRUMENTS:

Guitar; drums; keyboard; piano; flute; singer/songwriter

INCOMES:

$100,000-$1,000,000

Do you see yourself in these descriptions?  If so and you are looking for your last permanent relationship go to Posts To Read Before Joining Any Denver Matchmaking Service (click on this link) and check it out.  If it makes sense to you please give me a call 303-756-8106.

AN INTERVIEW WITH A 31-YEAR VETERAN DENVER MATCHMAKER

  1. What is your favorite part of matchmaking?  The interviewing and the coaching.  Of course the matchmaking process.
  2. Who do you least like to work with after 31 years?  Teachers (K-12) are the most difficult clients.  They are often flaky and don’t follow through as promised.  Again, disappointing and surprising but very consistent.  Also women in their twenties can be uncooperative.  When they are cooperative they are a pleasure, but have run into issues with some so I now start at 30.
  3. Why do you have an open-ended contract?  I cannot promise any new client that the perfect person is already in the service waiting for them on the day they join.  Nor is there any way of knowing when the “right” person will appear.  With that in mind I feel that every client NEEDS to have an open-ended contract so that they will be in the service when the right person presents themselves, whenever that may be.
  4. What has disappointed you the most about Denver matchmaking over 31 years?  The lack of appreciation.  It never ceases to amaze me and disappoint me when a couple becomes engaged and they don’t tell me, invite me to the wedding or tell the truth about how they met.  It appears to emanate from the women…who BTW are the most demanding of the clients.  So one would think that if you get the job done they would be appreciative.
  5. Who are the easiest clients to work with?  I have a post listing 4 or 5 personality traits that make working with certain clients both successful and a pleasure.
  6. Who are your most successful clients?  The most realistic ones who believe in the structure and trust me.
  7. How has your business been so successful while others have failed?  It is my heart, not just a business.  I really want everyone to succeed even though realistically I know that not everyone can.  I work full time on such a personal level with each client, which is why they choose to work with me.  So many clients have been successful because the structure of the service and my fees vary vastly from other Denver matchmaking services.
  8. Why don’t you advertise?  Because I’ve been in business for so long I cannot “water down” the quality of the clientele.  Advertising is very expensive and brings in a lot of inappropriate callers.  I have to be very diligent when accepting new clients who both fit in with current clients and who really understand and embrace the structure and philosophy of Bon Jour Matchmaking.  I only work with people who fit what my clients stipulate.  Also I would have to increase the fees to support advertising which I don’t want to do.
  9. How many matches should your clients expect to meet while in your service?  My hope is that they are so discerning they couple or marry the first or second match.  This is Matchmaking so not everyone is an appropriate prospect.  We decide together who they meet and they can meet as many people as they feel are good matches, but my preference is that we take our time and not wear them out with all the wrong ones so they are too discouraged to meet the right one(s).  To zero in on who they are looking for…the needle in the haystack.
  10. Your structure and philosophy seem popular and very successful with singles.  Have others tried to copy you?  There is a woman in L.A. who is the sister of a friend of mine who actually used language from my Press Kit verbatim to start her own service.  I had left my Press Kit with him and unknowingly to me, he gave it to her.  Locally not so much as the way I operate takes a lot of work on a personal level with each client and the local services don’t seem to want to put in the work.  If you do it right there can be a good deal of time and effort involved.

MEETING MICHELE THE MATCHMAKER OF BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE

Michele “the Matchmaker” Fields, dubbed that name by Denver Post columnist Bill Husted, has been matchmaking full-time for 35 years! As the “oldest” professional Matchmaker in Denver she never expected to learn as much as she has from her clients and the Denver singles population in general.

When structuring Bon Jour Matchmaking, Fields wanted to make this service totally different from any other by staying true to the title of “Matchmaker”.   Over these many years she’s honed her listening ability as well as seen patterns of behavior from clients, both good and bad, that direct the potential of a relationship. Her suggestions to clients come directly from more than a quarter century of experience and observation. Using those lessons by hand-holding clients through the process Bon Jour Matchmaking Service stands alone in the Front Range as an “Old Fashioned Matchmaking Service”.

It has become clear that Denver singles comparing local services are seeing Bon Jour stand out from the rest by virtue of the personal interaction, reasonable investment, feedback, quality of clientele, personal coaching, length of time in business and the list goes on.

Even in the 35th year of Denver matchmaking, rather than decreasing in popularity due to the Internet dating services, apps and Denver matchmaking services, there has been a substantial INCREASE in popularity and preference among the single professionals looking for love through a seasoned Matchmaker. On its 35th anniversary Bon Jour Matchmaking Service substantially increased its clientele without any publicity, advertising or other gimmicky props…merely on its own merit!

IS BON JOUR MATCHMAKING SERVICE RIGHT FOR YOU?

In an effort to assist you in deciding whether Bon Jour Matchmaking is the service for you, I’ve compiled a list of criteria that does not fit for Bon Jour clients. Should one or more of these describe you or your thought process I wish you good luck and suggest you phone another Denver matchmaking service:
1. If you are a man who is set on meeting only women 15+ years younger than yourself;

2. If you are a woman who states that you date men 5-10 years younger all the time, that is not going to happen in here;

3. If you are a male whose height is UNDER 5’8″ your success in Bon Jour is limited;

4. If you are a female who is larger than a size 8 your success in Bon Jour is limited;

5. If you are of the thinking that matchmaking is a “numbers game”, that is the total opposite of my philosophy;

6. If you feel that because you are paying a fee the service should absolutely work for you, you are not being realistic;

7. If you think that the day you join Bon Jour the “perfect” match is on file waiting for you, they may be but I cannot promise that…thus the OPEN-ENDED CONTRACT;

8. If you think that your success is totally in my hands, you are not being realistic. YOU are more than 50% of the success in a matchmaking service. You should collaborate and provide all that is needed and requested of you to add to your ultimate success;

9. If you come in and say, “this is the kind of person I date” and are not willing to be open and flexible when viewing profiles you will be less successful;

10.  If you have JUST gotten divorced you will not do well in Bon Jour until some time has passed.  My clients are leery of newly divorced singles;

11.  If you are planning on moving out of Colorado in the next few years you probably won’t do well;

12. If you have been burned by other Denver matchmaking services and have a bad attitude, please don’t contact me until you can get passed that frame of mind. Bon Jour is unlike any service in Denver!

Hopefully this list will assist you when choosing the right Denver matchmaker for you. You may ask how I know the above…28 years of full time matchmaking in the Denver marketplace. If I didn’t know the above you should question my expertise! Best of luck to you.